my life was never the same after reading “the only trick of friendship, i think, is to find people who are better than you are. not smarter, not cooler, but kinder and more generous, and more forgiving and then appreciate them for what they can teach you and try to listen to them when they tell you something about yourself no matter how bad or good it might be, and to trust them, which is the hardest thing of all. but the best, as well”
Jenny Slate // Casey McQuiston, Red, White & Royal Blue // Pleiades, Anne Carson // Taylor Jenkins Reid, The Seven Husbands of Evelyn Hugo // @oriley42 and @earth167 (and a half) on Tumblr // Jodi Picoult from The Book Of Two Ways // The Night Vale, Episode 100, The Toast // Adam Melchor, I Choose You // Kierston White, The Chaos of Stars
cant recommend this enough but if youre able you should go on walks every day. like fuck weather fuck circumstance uust go outside. got rained on today and it was blissful. even just sit outside get fucked up by crazy ass wind youll never forget how small you are and rememebr everything matters
the dreamer trilogy is for the people who are left behind. it is so deeply personal i cannot even articulate it.
something about always wanting to go home and then home becomes something that’s strangling you, something you can’t escape. something about home being a person but you never realized because place and person were intertwined until that person had to leave. something about wanting the world for everyone but yourself. something about resentment. and longing. and feeling unwanted. something about forcing yourself to keep going and living and creating in a place that is both the most familiar place and the most strange. something about not being able to change and looking in the mirror and seeing yourself and waking up and seeing yourself and waking up and seeing yourself. something about the line between what is real and what isn’t being blurred. something about forgiveness.
It’s weird to grow up in a family where you know you’re loved but you don’t feel loved. And then later in adulthood you understand how almost impossible it seems to cross that distance and let yourself experience closeness, how otherworldly love feels now and how love feels unbearable at times. You flinch when someone tries to wholeheartedly love you. And over and over you see so clearly how you cannot be loved unless it’s from afar and love is mixed with that familiar sensation of distance and coldness.
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